Left in the dark...

I woke up today at 3 something in the afternoon to the man coming in to say he was going into town and he wouldn’t be long, it was already dark, I wasn’t feeling too good, he was in a rush to get to the bank before it closed and so he left.

I haven’t been out anywhere in a while. When I do venture outside the home environment it is ALWAYS with the man, the man understands I don’t like people; he gets the whole phobia deal. I don’t trust anyone else to take me anywhere. I have in the past and I’ve either been left alone somewhere, or started to have a panic attack or just been thrown headfirst into awkward and horrible social situations. I can trust no-one. No-one but the man.

I actually felt like crying a bit when his car went down the driveway. Don’t get me wrong, I love being in the house by myself usually, but when he goes out without me it’s very much a lost opportunity to get out the house and go somewhere, for my own sanity if nothing else.

So I just sat up in bed, in the dark, in the eerily silent house and felt quite gutted. Sad really isn’t it?